How to choose a sober living home: an honest, practical guide

Choosing a sober living home is one of the most consequential decisions a person makes in early recovery. The right environment protects the fragile momentum built in treatment. The wrong one can quietly undo months of work. This guide is written to help you — or someone you love — ask the questions that separate a serious recovery residence from a rental with a label on it.

**1. Accountability structures.** Ask directly: how often are residents drug and alcohol tested, and what happens after a positive test? A credible home tests randomly, not just on a schedule, and has a clear, written policy for relapse — one that balances consequence with a pathway back into recovery. Vague answers here are the single biggest red flag.

**2. House rules and structure.** Look for written expectations covering curfews, chores, meeting attendance, employment or job search requirements, and guest policies. Structure is not punishment; it is the scaffolding early recovery leans on. Homes without rules are not 'flexible' — they are unmanaged.

**3. Peer community and leadership.** Who lives there, and who runs it? Ask about the length of sobriety of the house manager, whether residents have a voice in house decisions, and how conflicts are handled. A strong peer community — people a little further down the road — is often the most healing part of the environment.

**4. Level of support (know the NARR levels).** The National Alliance for Recovery Residences defines four levels, from peer-run (Level I) to clinically supervised (Level IV). Level II and Level III homes — monitored or supervised with staff on site — are the most common fit for someone just out of treatment. Ask which level the home operates at and why.

**5. Certification and licensing.** In many states, reputable sober living homes are certified by a NARR-affiliated state body. Certification is not a guarantee of quality, but its absence should prompt more questions. Ask to see the certificate and look up the certifying organization.

**6. Cost, fees, and what is actually included.** Get the full cost in writing: rent, deposits, program fees, drug testing fees, and any charges for meetings or transportation. Beware of homes that require you to sign over insurance benefits or attend a specific outpatient program as a condition of residence — that arrangement is a well-documented pattern of abuse in the industry.

**7. Connection to ongoing recovery.** A good home is a hub, not an island. Ask how residents connect to 12-step or alternative recovery meetings, outpatient care, therapy, and medical providers. Ask about the home's stance on medication-assisted treatment (MAT); a home that refuses residents on prescribed buprenorphine or naltrexone is out of step with modern evidence.

**8. Pathway to work and independence.** Long-term recovery requires income, purpose, and stability. Ask what workforce development, education, or employment support the home offers or connects to. The best homes treat the first job as a milestone, not a finish line.

**9. What to look for on a tour.** Visit in person if you can. Notice whether the house is clean and calm, whether residents make eye contact and seem engaged, whether the manager can articulate the program without reading from a script, and whether you are told 'yes' to everything. A home that will admit anyone tomorrow with no screening is a home with no standards.

**Ten questions to ask on the call.** (1) What NARR level are you? (2) Are you state-certified? (3) What is your testing schedule and relapse policy? (4) What are your house rules in writing? (5) Who is the house manager and how long have they been in recovery? (6) What is the total monthly cost and what does it include? (7) Do you accept residents on MAT? (8) How do residents connect to meetings, therapy, and work? (9) What is your average length of stay and what does success look like here? (10) May I speak with a current or former resident?

**A note on our approach.** The Kennerson Foundation operates sober living environments alongside workforce development and community support because we believe recovery is not just about staying sober — it is about building a life worth staying sober for. Whether you choose a home in our network or somewhere else, we hope this guide helps you ask the questions that matter. If you would like to talk through your options, reach out. We are happy to help even if the right fit is not us.